Torn
By Skybase

Then there was silence. A sort of sick feeling ran through his blood as he dropped the dagger down. He fucking did it. And he never regretted it. As the police came, he told to himself that he was contempt and happy, that everything was complete. And then, he was arrested for murder of two innocent people.

"Do you understand what you have done?" The interrogator asked.

"Yeah." He nodded. "I know what I did."

The interrogator held his head back a moment or two, and stretched his back on his seat. He looked at the kid in front of him and looked again into his eyes.

This kid, who sat calmly and quite peacefully in front of him was not a murderer at all. Aged sixteen, about 156 cm, blackish hair, brown eyes, wearing a somber-blue t-shirt was absolutely somebody who came out of a normal home from a normal life. Yet, he held a dagger and had stabbed two innocent people just a night ago.

"Do you feel guilt?"

"No. I could have done anybody. I don't care who died or who didn't."

And here he was explaining some corrupt thought that could not be gripped.

"Why?" The interrogator yelled.

The boy looked at him with an odd face, but with some sort of murky confusion and depression, he began, "Don't you get it? I really really don't care who it was or what it was. It could have been anybody. Like I did not have a clue or choice to who it was that I went for."

The man raised his voice, "And you killed two innocent people!"

"I get that it was two people! What you don't get is who! It's not how innocent they are, it's not how guilty in life they were! I don't care how happy, sad, lonely, old, young, stupid, smart, guilty, or innocent they were! They were just there. They stood there and I was there." He sat back on his chair, tired of defending himself. "Just put me behind bars."

"It makes no sense to put you behind bars if you can't figure out what you did wrong! What the hell is wrong with you? Don't you have a sense of humanity?"

"I lost it." The child said, "I lost it when I couldn't hold it anymore."

"So why? Why did you drive yourself into this?"

There was some ugly silence for a long while, then the kid started.

"I was pissed off. I was pissed off because I was always the 'target' at my school. Nobody cares about me as far as I know. My classmates were just turds. They were just bullies. They'll come up to me and make fun of me because they didn't like who I was. Fuck me, I don't know why they even bullied me. They treated me like dirt. I hated the guts out of them."

"So they made fun of you."

The kid ignored the man. He continued to speak, "They didn't beat me up or anything, nothing physical those assholes knew what not to do. They kept on calling names, throwing little pieces of trash at me, they made fun of me all they want, they spread rumors, they tossed verbal bullshit around, they humored on and on even after I told them to fucking stop. Then nobody listened or cared shit. The teachers said I had to handle it myself. They fucking told me to be a man."

True to his word, there was evidence of bullying. There were several public blogs and forum posts with pictures of him being mocked. There seemed excessive and targeted bullying happening.

"Be a man? That's what those idiot teachers told me! They told me to be a fucking man and live with it. How the hell am I supposed to do that?! When a name is destroyed, it's damn destroyed forever! For good! They told me I was not determined at all to change how they looked at me!" The kid stated. "I showed them what I can do. I showed them that when I am determined. I can do it. And when I can do it, I will do it."

Silence. Here, the interrogator had heard it all. That was it. This was him being torn apart by modern society, an inaudible monster. He was a victim of it.

He finally said, "I'm sure I'm famous on television now. I'm sure they're surprised. Hope they think twice."

The interrogator nodded, "You should think twice too."

_{-Skybase 2009}